Aug 12, 2022, Fri — While I was just now doing dishes, I thought of a million things I could blog upon. None being Part 2 of the Gaia Hypothesis. That will have to wait until I actually have a brain that has half a chance of forming sentences beyond stream of consciousness.
These last days have been so crazy. I’m still on a loaner computer the size of a sheet of paper, actually it’s quite a bit smaller than that. And my car has been gone since yesterday afternoon getting new brakes — meaning all night long, my car and I were separated!! I finally was shuttled back to it today at 1PM. A tearful reunion. Yes, over the bill. Front brakes, $400?! Which is what my computer will be, actually more like $500. When have I needed to replace brakes in a Prius before? Maybe one other time at 200K? I honestly don’t even remember that. So this is kinna weird at 85K. But then, who knows what adventures this innocent-looking automobile saw in its first 60K miles.
Oh, my god, I bore myself to tears writing down this kind of drivel.
I’m in the Billboard contest, oh joy, oh agony. It’s through Fine Art America and the premise is you submit up to 3 artworks, and if you can get 100 votes on any one of them, that piece advances in the contest. So, of course I can see my work on a billboard. It would look amazing. (Geez, I hope I didn’t already blog about this. I do not care to go check, if you are wondering why I don’t check first.) And that’s because right now, and many nows, I hate all these buttons.
It’s the case where your mind is going a million miles an hour thinking about a million things, you are having hundreds of interactions with other humans per day (sometimes per hour), and all that moves in my body are my fingertips and my eyeballs. (And my lips, as I read out loud what I am writing, and talk out loud with asides, which are NOT SFW. ) So if you wonder why I don’t go check, it’s because I’m effing over having to live as a basically disembodied brain with a f**kton of stupid shit to do all the time.
I have been in such a dark mood. THANK GOD for the yellow plumeria that is emerging ANYWAY in the studio. I got in 3 hours today some freaking how. And it’s looking amazing.
I have not had a good night’s sleep since July 31, I swear (not to God). This 15th year is really doing a number. I sure hope I can sleep tonight. For some reason, I am manic by day regardless of how little sleep I get. I feel supercharged, like an animal, like I’m taller even. So weird. I’m so insanely alive.
Thankfully, Rae Rae LIKED my hybrid bio thing and the 2 different artist statements that I stayed up last night into obscene hours in this wired state writing for her show. I was so devastated when I read them this morning, them seeming like total kibble, or worse, overly sensitive wet food smelling godawful on the counter, so I asked Rae Rae, since she used to be an editor, if she would work them over. Well, shocker, she wrote back and said they were wonderful and she wasn’t touching them. Okay… well, that did calm me down. I guess it’s a case of dark mood makes for dark perceptions.
THANK GOD, I am painting in YELLOW. Because I’m LOVING the painting. Not dark, not even close. It’s so crazy tantalizingly delicious you won’t believe it! And YOU are feeling the same about my newsletter, right? Don’t make me crazy!!